Feeling useless

Dear D,

I have just seen the dreadful fire in the tower block in London, and it has really hit me, mainly because it I guess because I have relations living near there. However, I am feeling useless, and feel like I want to do something to help, but how can I ? I live eighty miles away and work full time, is there any other way I can help?

Jamie

 

Dear Jamie,

Many people are in your situation, and most people want to help in some way. Well luckily there are ways in which you can help, I too have family living nearby so understand your concern. Firstly you can check out locally if you area has any collections of clothing, food, toiletries etc. Secondly, there are several online appeals where you can donate money via a just giving pageor maybe the Kensington and Chelsea foundation website. Thirdly, Simon Cowell is creating a single in aid of the Grenfell Tower fire victims, you can buy that when it is released. So even from the distance you are, you can help. It is warming to see how the whole of the UK have rallied together to help the victims. So don’t feel as if your not doing your bit, you are just donate whatever you can – time, money, clothing, or anything.

Ask D

 

Pregnant

pregnant

 

Dear D,

I have just discovered I’m pregnant, and I’m scared of telling my boyfriend in case he leaves me. We are both eighteen and really are not ready for settling down just yet. I don’t believe in abortions either – what can I do?

Love Sandra

 

Dear Sandra

I am unable to see a question here really, you don’t believe in abortions and yet you’re too young to settle down? You HAVE to do one of the two. I’m sorry but in this day and age there is hardly any excuse for unwanted pregnancies – birth control has never been so easy or accessible. However, you are now pregnant and you have to get your head around it, discuss it with your boyfriend and family, this is your first and most vital step. Once it has sunk in, and reactions have been revealed – then and only then can you make any further decisions. You can contact Worth talking about, Brook, or the Samaritans to help you further.

Ask D

Generous

hand

 

Dear D,

I have a friend, whom I love dearly – as a friend. But he is too generous. Whenever we go out, he wants to pay (and does without my knowing most of the time). He treats me so kind on birthdays and Christmas that I feel my gifts to him are inadequate. I do enjoy the attention but wonder if he is getting his hopes up, thinking there is more than friendship between us? I don’t want to lose him as a friend, am I reading too much into it.

Best wishes

Tom

 

Dear Tom,

Firstly do you actually know whether this man fancies you? Has he made it clear? Or is he just being friendly. I can understand that someone treating yo like a prince, might seem as if they’re wanting ‘that bit more’, but normally, it is within their personalities to be generous. You should sit him down and ask him straight.

Ask D

My sisters husband

sorry

Dear D,

My sister got married a few weeks ago, but before her and her now husband got hitched they went through a ‘bad’ patch in their relationship. I’m happily single – or so I thought. Anyway, three weeks before her wedding I slept with her man. We agreed at the time it was a ‘one – off’ , but he keeps texting me now – saying how great the sex was, and he wants to hook up again. I agree the sex was great, and I am so tempted by meeting up again, but am scared about losing my sister and family. What should I do?

Mary

 

Dear Mary,

I’d suggest you either go to a sex shop and buy a sexual relief product or go out and get a man of your own. You’re right in thinking that you will not only lose your sister, but your whole family too. Is it really worth a quick fumble? How could you have even contemplated going for seconds or thirds? You need to walk away from this situation now, keep your distance from your brother in law, ignore any texts he says you – it will only lead to disaster.

Ask D

To report or not

priest.pngDear D,

My friend has told me that a local vicar has been ‘touching him’, he didn’t say any more, and didn’t seem upset at all, but begged me not to say anything. But it’s been weighing on my mind – should I say anything? We are both twelve years old.

Lee

 

Dear Lee

In reply to your question – yes, you should say something. Have a private word with your teacher at school. Or if you feel able why not try talking to your parents? If that fails, try the NSPCC or Childline. This thing has been going on for years, and no doubt will go on for many to come too. Any touching of a minor (that’s someone under 16 years old preferably older) is illegal, and while I’m not saying this is a sexual contact – it seems that your friend – by the very fact he has told you is not happy with it. Your friend may be putting on a brave face, but it might very well affect him in the future. If you contact one of the organisations or people I have mentioned, they will be able to offer expert advice, its free and confidential so please do it.

Ask D

 

Bullying

bully

Dear D,

I am a my wits end, my son is fourteen and has been bullied at school for several years. I’ve spoken to the school, but nothing has been done about it. Where do I go from here?

Jennifer

 

Dear Jennifer,

As victims of bullying I can fully sympathise. After contacting the school and apparently failing, you should next try the school board of governors, followed by the county council education authority. For more help contact one of the following:

If you are being bullied, please do contact one of the organisations above – do not suffer in silence.

Ask D

Sicko next door

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Dear D,

We’ve been told that our new next door neighbour is a paedophile. As you can imagine we are not happy at all. My husband wants to do him some damage like he damages the little ones. I’m torn

Esther

 

Dear Esther,

Firstly find out if what you have been told is true, you can do this by visiting the police and enquiring. Secondly remember the old adage that two wrongs do no make a right. But be alert and vigilant around him especially if you see children hanging around or going near him. Then report him immediately.

Ask D